Best/Worst Nerd Dating Experience: And the Winners Are…

By Chris Cummins April 3, 2012 Nerdery 0 Comment

?First off, I have to thank each and every one of you that entered this contest. It’s not easy to share your personal tales of romantic triumph and tragedy with (mostly futile) hopes of winning a free T-shirt, but nearly 300 of you did. Well done. I found your insights to be touching and, at times, surprisingly heartbreaking. Again, I do truly appreciate you all telling me about your nerdy dating experiences. (Or lack thereof). Now if only you guys actually paid attention to the contest intro and kept your entries brief. Sigh. Oh well.

Unfortunately, I only had two TR shirts to give away. I picked winners whose stories captivated/horrified me, and I hope you’ll agree with my findings. As you’ll see by the quality of the honorable mentions, coming up with the actual winners was a Herculean task to say the least. Hit the jump to see what I came up with.

Here are the honorable mentions:

Brando Lars:

Back in college there was a super Hot girl in the Sci-Fi club I belonged
to. But she was dating an acquaintance. One day in one of our School’s
many lounges the boyfriend turns to me and asks me to spend some time
with his girlfriend over the long weekend because he was worried about
leaving her alone. You see I found out that apparently she had cheated
on him the last time he went away and he didn’t trust her to be left
alone. (but he did trust me to be left alone with her sigh) He had NO
IDEA of the feelings I had been harboring for this girl for 3 semesters.
I agreed to go and see her that weekend. Saturday I spend 3 hours
traveling to and from her house each way, We sat and talked for 4 hours
and she explain the entire cheating incident to me as if it was a
confessional. Mean while all the while I’m thinking “me, I might as well
just be a girlfriend…….” Then she went out with some friend for a
night on the town and I took the bus home. This girl might very well
have been the ultimate geek chick into RPG and videogames but she
couldn’t keep it out of her pants . with everyone but me. Sigh. In hindsight the fact that we knew each other from the Sci-Fi fantasy club is
the only thing that really makes this geeky.

Monkey boy:

I went on a couple of dates with this nerdy girl. They were okay, but
then I saw on Facebook she entered into a relationship with another
guy. No big deal because we only went out like twice, but this is the
bad part: I saw his pic on Facebook and he was wearing this Woot shirt
(disapproving narwhal) that I had ordered but got lost in the mail. So
he got the girl and the shirt, but it was the shirt that hurt the most.

Fumbles:

I was hanging out with a friend of mine. We were board and she decided
to turn on Netflix to see what was on. We found the Star Trek animated
series. She looked at me and asked if I was ok with it. I love star
trek so I was down. We watched the entire season that weekend, we’re
now engaged. I’d call that a win.

Doc:

So I’m not sure if this is the best or worst, frankly it could have gone
either way. Considering that we’re still together I’ll call it best.

So
I met a wonderful, beautiful woman named April. It was something of a
blind date since we had some mutual friends but hadn’t met in person yet
though we had talked online. We decide to meet up at a nearby bar and
we find that we’re enjoying eachother’s company but that the bar is a
little too noisy to have a real conversation. Since there’s a beach
nearby we figure it would be great to get some privacy and get a chance
to talk while having a walk on the beach late at night.

Eventually
the topic of nerdy interests come up and I admit that I’m a pretty big
nerd. She admits that she’s most definitely not nerdy but that she
somehow finds my enthusiam slightly adorable without being overbearing.

Feeling
brave I decided to push my luck and to try to find SOME kind of nerdy
common ground so I start listing the various nerdy things I’m into when I
finally run across Harry Potter. When HP comes up her interest suddenly
goes from benign disinterest to grabbing my shirt with a mad look in
her eyes yelling “I WANT TO BE A WIZARD!”

Considering we were on a
deserted beach late at night this should have been more than a little
terrifying but I’m glad I didn’t run screaming because I’ve wound up
with a beautiful woman who is able to laugh with me about how obsessive
we can get over our respective passions.

IronicMan:

Girlfriend breaks up just as you’re about to finish off season 2 of
Doctor Who. I don’t want to watch Daleks fighting Cybermen by myself- a
lonely nerdgasm is a sad nerdgasm.

Mat-Man:

My girlfriend (who I’m madly in love with) posted our relationship as
her best nerd relationship on Topless Robot’s Best/Worst Nerd
Relationship contest. No matter who gets the shirt, I think I win this
contest.

Bazzzinga:

Well
a couple or so years ago I had a pretty big thing for the sister of one
of my mates, I’d been friends with her for a little while and she was
nice, really cute and her only problem was that she was not at all
nerdy, but I really didn’t care. So one day when I was invited to a
party at her house that’s when I decided, I was gonna go to that party
hang out with her and try to act as normal and non-nerdily charming as
possible to atleast be in a chance of getting out of her friend zone.

We were about an hour into the party and things were going pretty
well, but that’s when I saw it, a beautiful metallic object glistening
in the light of a nearby TV Screen, her
brother was holding a Luke
Skywalker Master Replicas lightsaber with realistic lighting and
original sound effects, I had to go and inspect it and while we were
chatting about how awesome it was he told me he’d also just gotten the
Darth Vader version and that we should totally have a duel with them to
test them out. Blinded by nerdy desire I agreed but decided that if we
did it outside and tried to be as discreet as possible, I could probably
get away with the duel without hurting my chances with his sister. But
what was supposed to be a quick 10 minute duel quickly turned into a 45
minute long epic complete with movie quotes, Darth Maul choreography
impersonations and ended with a who could do the best Darth Vader
“NOOOOO!” contest.

It was when we got back in that we realised we’d been the nerdy
entertainment from the bathroom window for the whole time. And needless
to say his sister who’d seen the whole spectacle now viewed me about as
likely a potential romantic partner as a cancerous cyst on a Sarlaccs
tentacle. But it all worked out fine in the end she met someone and fell
in love… I got myself four Master Replicas lightsabers and grew
increasingly nerdy and bitter, incidentally it’s about the same time I
started commenting on Topless Robot.

Watcher409:

When I still lived in Mississippi there was a small comic shop
with a TARDIS for the door to the stockroom that the owner had built
himself. There were usually some fairly attractive girls in there but on
the one day I went in the shop wearing a Doctor Who shirt there was one
girl who just stuck out from everyone else. I didn’t say anything to
her seeing as I can be rather shy at times and then when I’m standing
next to the TARDIS she came up and complimented me on my shirt and said
she loves Doctor Who and always wished she could be a companion on the
show. So instead of just asking her to go for coffee I yelled “ALLONS-Y”
and grabbed her hand and took off with her through the TARDIS.
Naturally we laughed when we went through the door and the room on the
other side was in fact bigger than the TARDIS. We then made a mad dash
for the exit and went into the coffee shop across the street where we
sat and talked about comics, games, books, movies, and music until we
both had to leave. We exchanged numbers and I later learned the irony of
how we met when she told me about her ex who likes to call himself The
Master. As great as all that is we sadly only dated for about 6 months.

Paige Wesley:

In college I was what most people would call desperate.
Being super nerdy all through high school hadn’t done me any favors, and
despite joining a sorority and trying to go full-tilt girly girl in
college, I was still striking out. So I was stoked when a friendship I’d
been fostering with a similarly nerdy frat guy was starting to grow
into something a little bit more.

One night, we were sitting around the common room of my chapter
house, bored, when my RA opened the door of her room and beckoned us
inside. Opening a cabinet, she revealed no less than a metric fuckton of
liquor, proclaiming, “I’m bored, let’s get drunk.” We ended up watching
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and trying to play a makeshift
drinking game to go along with it. 3 hours later, I’m about 6 sheets to
the wind and surprised to find that at some point in the evening we had
wandered over to a friend’s party. I was even more surprised to learn
that my guy friend was currently in the process of trying to hook up
with my RA in the back bedroom. I was even more surprised to realize
that it was Thursday and not Friday as I had initially thought, meaning I
had class at 10am the next morning. I rushed back to my house and
passed out crying.

The next morning, I woke up late for class. I threw on clean clothes,
grabbed my purse and my MacBook, not even bothering to put it in a
computer bag, and ran outside. Unfortunately in my drunken haze the
night before I had neglected to notice it was raining, our lawn was
soaking wet. I slipped and landed flat on my back. When I opened my eyes
again, the first thing I saw was my MacBook sticking straight up out of
the mud. I dumped the water out of my purse, and as I pulled my
computer out of the ground with a soul-crushing “schlorp” I decided it
might be best if I stayed single for a while.

Sean:

When I first met the woman who, luck permitting, will next week be my
fiance, I quoted and cited Swamp Thing: “It was a blind leap into the
dark with fingers crossed” as part of my pitch to get her to go out with
me.

For reasons still unknown to me, she said yes.

Clockwork_Smurf:

Right after I started dating my now wife, Halloween came around. My
friends expected the smurf costume be worn and I would not miss the
chance to blue myself, so I had to pick her up all made up and
frightening as my way of outing myself as a smurf nerd. Apparently, I
was her first smurf nerd. I had to ask her, “is this a deal breaker?” as
I stood in front of her, almost thirty and covered in blue, and I said
it mostly to break the silence. She decided it wasn’t and I instantly
began wondering what secret she had in store for me.

Shadout:

Early in our dating relationship, my current boyfriend wrote me this:
“Seriously, I can’t *stop* smiling. I really feel complete, you know?
Again, I had no idea that was possible. You’ve transformed a universe
today. It used to be cold and uncaring, but now it’s warm and full of
love. You’ve conquered my heart. Or, in geek terms, you totally
Unicron-ed my Cybertron”. And I fell harder than an AT-AT with a tow
cable wrapped around its legs.

LamarRevenger:

BEST: Went on a date with a girl I knew for awhile. Took a year for this
to happen, but I was glad it did. I wanted to take her to see Return of
the King. She wasn’t into the whole geek life (she’s a musical theatre
nut) so I was kinda scared she’d want to leave mid movie. Well end of
the movie hits, I’m crying, she’s crying, I lean in & kiss her.
Right now she’s taking care of our sick 4 year old boy who’s gonna be a
G1 Transformer/Star Wars/videogame lovin Broadway star.

FrizzotheClown:

I was living in Germany in the late 90’s. I started dating a local girl.
We dated for about 7 or 8 months when she dropped two bombshells. 1)
She had been to a David Hasselhoff concert. And cried. 2) She had never
seen any of the Star Wars movies. Not one. That was the deal breaker.

OtherHalfofBattle:

I have been a nerd for many things, one of them being
REM. I know it’s not the usual love that is confessed here, and believe
me (and her) – I have my more typical geek passions, but it was that
collect-everything-find-bootlegs-buy-shirts-call-yourself-a-distiple
type of love that most of us know as a nerdy passion. So when I was
driving home with her, my just out of high school girlfriend, I heard
REM was going to be in town that summer with Radiohead opening for them.
I was so happy I literally got choked up. She watched this unfold and
said, “I will never make you that happy.”

This was the first girl I had ever taken to bed (and back roads and
whatnot) and she knew my geeky passions made me happier than all of
that, the stuff my hormones and society said should be priority one as
an eighteen year old boy. And I realized then the same thing – I was not
normal.

But it was the best concert ever.

The Jinx:

My BEST dating experiences happen almost every week. Me and my TBG
(tubby bearded guy) go to Carney’s for a chili burger, chili fries (size
small, shared!) and a Pepsi, then we go to Golden Apple to get our
weekly pulls and such. Then home to drool over said treasures. Then we
watch something neat like Akira, Babylon 5, Hellsing, or even My Science
Project. Then to bed for kinkysexytimes! Yay Nerdery!

Jedisilk:

The husband and I had our first date at a movie called The Bedsitting
Room. Never heard of it? Well, neither had I…the husband is a MAJOR
film enthusiast. So anyway, what is the movie about? Imagine if Monty
Python had made a post nuclear war movie…you see that in your heads?
Yes, its THAT insane and awesome. The nuclear fallout causes a woman to
turn into a dresser…amongst other things. Apparently, this was his
test to see if my sense of humor was deranged enough for him… Result?
Well…he is called the HUSBAND for a reason. Yay for us! So yeah,
definitely best nerd date EVER.

mildmannerednerd:

Hm…possibly worst dating experience was in High School (surprise
surprise!) I was going out with this wonderful person, we were getting
along great, until movie night. For whatever reason we decided to watch a
Batman movie. I wanted to watch my favorite at the time, “Batman
Returns”…she wanted to watch her favorite “Batman and Robin”. That was
the end of that relationship.

SocksArgyle:

(This was certainly the best for me at the time, but is now the worst/most embarrassing. Live and learn.)

During the early days of the Internet (circa 1996), I was away at
college and spent a great deal of time in the school’s computer lab.
Being incredibly shy and lonely, I went to a sci-fi/fantasy-themed chat
room and met a young woman from the U.K. She loved all the same books
and movies I did, and over the course of several weeks of exchanges, I
found myself growing more and more smitten. Then, one day, I wrote her a
rather wistful e-mail about how much I wished I could afford to fly
from the U.S. to her home, so that we could go on a date.

“Oh, but we can!” she wrote back. “Tomorrow, in the room.”

Now, in the chat room we frequented, I was a “Dark, Gloomy Vampire
Prince with a Demonic Sword and a Penchant for Flirting with Every
Female He Sees”. (Just about every male in a chatroom plays some version
of this character, but I tampered mine down for her.) Meeting her in
the room (she was playing a fairy/sorceress), she then went on to
describe Falkor the Luckdragon coming down to fly us off into the
sunset. We had wine and cakes on his back, and later, out of character,
she went on to tell me about how shitty her day had been between getting
her period and her brother’s guinea pig dying. Consoling her, we later
ended up having a marathon cybersex session until three in the morning,
which was in character and on Falkor’s back. (For some reason Falkor
didn’t seem to mind.)

I still tell this to my wife when she needs a good laugh.

Geekless:

Worst: The guy who mocked me mercilessly for having a fantasy novel on
my bedside table and then tried to calculate how much I’d spent on the
collection of graphic novels on the bookshelf next to us. This guy: not
a master of timing. I’ve never been less turned on to have a naked man
in my bed.

kroozer101:

My best dating experience was when, after a really nice dinner, my
girlfriend and I went to a local laundromat (don’t ask why, I don’t even
remember) that operated all night. We sat there reading the comic books
I kept in the trunk of my car until three in the morning. We were woken
up by one of the morning-shift workers at seven a.m., because we’d
fallen asleep with Deadpool back issues in our hands. It gives me fuzzy
feelings to this day.

Lauren Ziegler:

So, back in high school, I went to a party for one of my closest
friends. I notice this big, tall guy as soon as I entered the room,
standing away from everyone, looking a bit downcast. He’s not having a
good time, so I go up to him to say hello. We exchange names, and
pleasantries, and I hug him before I leave, saying it was nice to meet
him. He doesn’t say much — he’s not talkative, very shy, but like his
demeanor, nerdy in a quiet way.

The following week, he followed me into cafeteria and managed to
weasel my AOL screen name out of me. We chat late at night, telling
secrets and being far more verbal then we normally are face to face. We
talk about what nerd interests we have, I like George R. R. Martin,
Dune, Star Trek, he’s more of a Gamer, Star Wars, and a huge film
nerd. Eventually he works up the nerve to ask me out to a movie….and
not just any movie: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. After our
date, we’re sitting in the car, saying nothing. He’s frigidity, clearly
trying to work up the nerve to say something…. I grab him by sides of
his face, and plant a big kiss on his cheek. His face turns crimson,
speechless once again, but he has a huge grin on his face.

6 years later. We’ve gone through numerous break ups, both short and
sometimes as long as several months not a word between us. It’s the
communication that’s the problem, he doesn’t talk, and then I don’t talk
because I get angry…. I had started to date a nerdy doctor, and then
he calls me, shyly asking me out on Valentine’s….I said no, I’m dating
someone else. Fast forward to 3 months later, he in tears begs me to
take him back. I’m shocked, so shocked in fact I can’t say no, and tell
him he has 3 weeks. I tell him that he needs to talk to me, that for 6
years he hasn’t talked and I can’t take it any longer. If he loves me,
he needs to *tell* me.

A week later he takes me out. At the very end of the date, he gives
me a signed copy of George R. R. Martin’s 1st published novel “A Dying
of the Light” from 1977. Martin! My all time favorite author! I open it
up ….

And written in his scrawling hand: “Lauren, if you ever feel the
dying of the light, you only need to look at this book to know you are
loved. — Phil”

We’ve been engaged for 2 years, and in a few weeks will be our 8th
anniversary. Hopefully this time in a year or 2, we’ll finally tie the
knot. He calls me his Sunshine, not only because of my blond hair but
for the way I light up his life. He’s my Sunshine too, and we tell each
other every single day that we love each other. And when I’m not next to
him, a part of me feels missing…..

P.S. I still don’t know how I feel about him desecrating a 1st
edition signed sci fi by Martin….but I think it was worth it. 🙂

Terry Shipley:

I had a girl refuse to date me because I said Deep Space Nine was better than Voyager.

Murphys Law:

Saddest date: I was dating a girl who absolutely loved Star Wars, which I
really love the original trilogy too. She even went as slave leia for
halloween. One day though, we sat down to watch a movie, and it was the
new Star Trek movie preview. I mentioned that I actually like Star Trek,
and she broke up with me on the spot. Very sad day. I love both the
Trek and the Wars and because of that I lost a really cool nerdy girl.

Gishmaster:

A few years ago I got a job as the Easter Bunny. It paid good and I
have the right body type to fill out the costume. After I did that job I
got requests to appear at local events in assorted costumes. Over time I
got affiliated with a charity that has a Lion for a mascot. I would
wear this Lion costume in parades and show up to charity events. After a
few times wearing the suit they told me to just take it home instead of
returning it to them. I kept it in my closet and only brought it out
when I was requested to by the charity. After awhile I forgot about the
costume. I started dating this girl and after a few dates we go back
to my place, eventually moving into the bedroom. She requested the
lights off but wants some light so I turned on the light in my closet.
After a bit I went to the bathroom to get some condoms. When I came
back she has the closet door open and was staring at the costume. I
stammer and try to explain but before I can she tells me to shut up and
put on the costume. I ask and again and she responds with an authority
and confidence I have never heard from her before to put on the costume.
So I did. She dry humped me naked while I was in the lion costume.
It was the strangest sexual experience of my life. Unfortunately, I
kept dating her. The next time we agreed to see each other she asked me
to come over to her place. When I showed up she was standing in her
apartment dressed as a aqua-marine colored fox.That’s when it really
hit me, I was dating a furry. Her suit was professionally made, it had
breasts and a moving tail. Whilst I tried to be comfortable with her
peculiarities in the end it was just too weird.

Shwee-Shwee

Four years ago, I was working with my aunt at the fairgrounds
in my town in one of the food booths. There were a few guys working
there with me, all of them really cute, but one of them stood head and
shoulders above the rest (literally; he’s 6’3″). Tall, skinny, glasses,
kind of shy, the most gorgeous smile I’d ever seen. I flirt with him the
whole time, and he’s obviously into me, too, but he’s really
introverted and doesn’t say much. He’s only working for the one day,
though, so I decide to take it upon myself and ask him out on a date,
since he’s obviously too shy to ask me himself. We go on our date…and
it’s pure, unadulterated magic. We find out we both love the same
things: anime, MST3K, Thomas Dolby, The Big Lebowski, retro video games.
We quote and act out almost the entire Ghostbusters movie. While seeing
a movie at the drive-in he comes back from the bathroom and gives me a
bootleg Yu-Gi-Oh card he found because he knew I’d get a kick out of the
bad translation. He’s totally awesome and out of his shell at this
point. He told me later while we were sitting in the car at the drive-in
together that he never used to be that shy, but his past girlfriends
and girls in general over the years treated him like dirt because of the
things he liked, and he was afraid that I would do the same. I hugged
him and said I thought the he, and what he liked, was wonderful.

We’ve been together ever since, been married two years and have two kids now.

GrimlockPrime:

I am a member of a Medieval re-enacting group. I take great
pride in my Scottish heritage & enjoy putting on a Great Kilt &
doing public demonstrations of swordsmanship. Two years ago, I met a
girl at a Renaissance Fair. She was a friend of a member of the
re-enacting group. She was wearing a medieval dress, and she was
beautiful. It took me a while to muster up the courage to finally start
a conversation. After a little while, we found out that we had a lot
in common. She came back for the second day of the Fair & we spend
most of our time getting to know each other. After having the BEST. DAY. EVER!, we arranged to hang out the next weekend. I was terrified that
she would run away when she saw my respectable Transformers & LEGO
collections. Instead, she looked at me & asked “Can I play with
them?” I fell in love that week & have never been happier.

We are getting married this fall, with a Medieval Themed wedding.

Caitlin:

When
this contest was posted yesterday I immediately went past it since I’d
had absolutely no romantic anything in my life and there was no way I
could post an entry.

Well, last night I had my first kiss with the guy who played Dr.
Horrible in my student-run production of it backstage during a talent
show I was MCing. It may be the only thing that I’ve done, but it’s
still the best.

Naturally I assume that it happened because I was destined to win a shirt this time around.

Fitz Bailey:

I dumped a man for never having/refusing to see Star Wars, as a man
myself, I believe it’s required viewing. He was also a film
major specializing in ScFi, I think he should have been thrown out of
school.

CoffeeCat:

Last August, I grabbed a piece of parchment, cut it and folded it up to
make it look like the Doctor’s Psychic Paper. I then wrote a message in
invisible ink. Gave the paper to my girlfriend, who was a big fan of DW,
and told her that it was psychic paper and my deepest feelings were
within. It obviously left her confused, as the paper seemed blank. I
then whipped out the 10th Doctor’s Sonic Screwdriver replica, and used
the UV light to make my message appear: “I love you, will you marry
me?”…We got married last January.

Hexican:

The Alamo Draft House(the coolest movie chain in existence) was
opening up a new cinema in Austin, and to celebrate they brought in
Edgar Wright to present Scott Pilgrim, Hot Fuzz, and Shaun of the Dead.
Obviously, the gf and I had to make the four hour drive to experience
this.

So being at an awesome theater, watching awesome movies, with the
director himself would be a pretty good date in itself. But what makes
it the best nerd date is that before presenting Shaun of the Dead, I got
picked along with two other people to try to use a record to knock the
head off a mannequin they brought to the front of the stage. The first
two people had their turn and failed, and I guess the nerd gods were
smiling at me that day, as when it came to my turn, I managed to knock
the head off.

The whole audience cheered loudly, we all got free drinks, and I have a picture of Edgar Wright toasting my beheading skills.

kurt_eh:

I once had a boss who said of his first date with his ex wife.

“We saw Eraserhead on our first date.”

“That pretty much sums up the entire relationship.”

Patch999:

I had been dating this girl for a few months and early on had introduced her to MST3K.
She
put up with my riffing during movies and TV shows. After awhile I could
tell by her pity laugh, when it was time to stop and let her enjoy the
show.

Then she invited me to church. At the closing prayer the pastor was
saying “Jesus, Only you can save us. Only you can lead us from sin. Only
you…”
“Can prevent forest fires” I added.

It just slipped out. I did not get the pity laugh.

TheProperVillain:

While drinking through an “around the world” party back in
college, My knowledge of Fawlty Towers, specifically my ability to quote
lines by Manuel, got me laid by a visiting British chick, that and the
fact that I was the only non frat boy, therefore the only one who was
not a douchebag.

adnomad:

I really only have a best for me. I was talking to this girl and she
knew I was a nerd but I didn’t think she was anything of one. She worked
with me and found me and a co-worker talking about how we found it odd
that there was a Klingon dictionary and how there were colleges that
taught it. She over heard and basically went over how stupid that she
thought it was. I knew all of this but not a big Klingon guy and was now
mildly embarrassed. The next day, she delivered me a letter in Vulcan.
It had nothing to do with Star Trek, it was about how dumb she thought
Klingons were. We’ve been together for 5 years.

TomeMinder:

I
was dating my first and, so far, only girlfriend and we went to her
apartment for a little “fun”. At this point I had never done anything
and was finally trusting her enough to go for that intimacy. We spent
some time chatting about movies and stuff before she finally decided to
stop waiting for me to take the lead and started a rather intense
make-out session. I was actually guiding her toward the bedroom when
she started kissing my neck and glanced up at the clock. In a split
second she pushed me away, ran to the living room and logged into her
WoW account. I asked her what they hell she was doing and she informed
me, without a shred of sarcasm or apology, that she had a raid she was
integral to and needed to hook up with the group. So I wouldn’t be
lonely while she gamed she called a mutual friend to come over and hang
out with me.

Essentially, I was cock-blocked by World of Warcraft.

Ryno_Noobslayer:

Worst:

She thinks Jar Jar Binks is the best thing about Star Wars….nobody is perfect..

gagalavatron:

I honestly said this, to my undying shame: It’s too soon to say we’re in love, but my neutrinos are drifting in your direction.

In the blissful circumstance you don’t get the reference, it’s from
TNG’s “Wesley in Love” episode. I could claim that love makes you do
stupid things, but I voluntarily used *Wesley Crusher* as a metaphor for
my love life. To someone I wanted to love me back. Phasers on “kill me now.”

Ashlandateam:

My
high school sweetheart and I used to play Super Nintendo nearly every
day. Keep in mind, this was 2002; the SNES was already nostalgic, simple
fun from my youth. Well, after she unceremoniously dumped me because,
and I quote, ‘Being with you isn’t fun,’ she returned my SNES sans half
of my games, including Super Mario World, Super Mario All-Stars, The
Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, and Kirby Superstars.
Oh, but she did give me the ‘present’ of Super Tennis. I lost Mario, Link and Kirby and got back freaking tennis. What a whore.

Boobnoob:

I’m about to leave college and I’ve never been on a date. I’ll put that down for best and worst.

And the winners are…:

Best:

Dancore:

My
wife and I met almost 25 years ago when we were kids. I was friends
with her sister, Mandy, and we met at Mandy’s 8th grade graduation
party. She was a punk chick, completely intimidating, and absolutely
beautiful. Eventually, we went to school together and became friends.
Then, she moved away, and I remained friends with her sister. Years
later, Stacy (my wife) moved back to Chicago and got a job with FASA,
along with her husband at the time. By this time, I had moved away to
college down state. However, because I was still friends with her
sister, Stacy and I would run into each other randomly over the years
and talk about music, games, conventions, etc. She and her husband
started their own gaming company (ZN games) and moved to the east coast
while I moved to Baton Rouge for grad school. Sadly, her husband died,
and she moved back to our old neighborhood to work at her brother’s bar.
Months later, I lost my job at LSU and moved back to the old
neighborhood as well. Imagine my surprise when I walked into the local
bar and saw a girl I’d had a crush on for over 15 years working there.
We talked about the same old things, and eventually, I borrowed a CD
from her (Probot), but I was still too intimidated to ask her out. One
night, my best friend said, “If you don’t ask her out, I am going to
punch you in the face.” So, I did. I made lasagna, and she brought over a
tasty 12-pack and the Japanese horror film, Stacy (it’s a weird-ass
zombie flick featuring a chainsaw weapon called “Bruce Campbell’s right
arm”). We watched the movie, ate, and talked until 6:00 a.m. We’ve been
together ever since.

The point of the story is this: I don’t believe in fate, and I don’t
even believe in God, but I do believe in true nerd love. One day, I hope
all of you get as lucky as I did.

P.S. When you mix your comic collections together, you’ll know she’s/he’s the one.

That story is incredibly touching and so sweet. It shows that Huey Lewis is indeed right when he says that the power of love is a curious thing. Wait? Did I just wax poetic about Huey Lewis? This contest is making me all mushy. Maybe the winner for worst nerdy dating experience can snap me out of it:

Supercapo16

Worst: Took a girl I barely knew out so that my friend wouldn’t feel
obligated to ask her (long story, don’t ask). Ten minutes before I’m
supposed to pick her up she called me and asked me to promise to take
her on the date no matter what she looked like. A little concerned, but
knowing I’d feel like a cad if I didn’t agree I promised. It was dark
when I picked her up so I couldn’t get a good look at her, but nothing
seemed weird. So I started to think that she was just self-conscious. At
least until I saw her face in the light. Turns out she had gone to the
Spud Harvest Fair (it’s a big deal, trust me) and gotten her face
painted. Every time I looked at her that night I saw freaking Pikachu
stare back with his cold dead eyes.

Needless to say there was not a second date.

Yep. That did it. Dating Pikachu is horror beyond imagination.

Congratulations to the winners, and thanks again to everyone who entered!

About The Author

Chris Cummins is a pop culture writer and Archie comics historian who has contributed to The Robot's Voice, Den of Geek US, Philebrity, Geekadelphia, Uproxx, and Unicorn Booty. He is the co-producer and co-host of Nerd Nite Philadelphia, and is regularly involved in producing and hosting New York Super Week events. In 2014, Chris began Sci-Fi Explosion, a mix of live performance, trivia and funny clips celebrating the weirdest in science fiction that regularly travels around the United States. He wrote the introductions to the compilations Archie's Favorite Comics From The Vault and (with Paul Castiglia) Archie's Favorite High School Stories. You can find Chris on Twitter at @bionicbigfoot and @scifiexplosion.

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