Don't watch this preview: Star Wars: The Force Unleashed

Posted by Jonathan McNamara at 1:37 AM Apr 11, 2008

It's less than 5 months until September and you know what that means; time for Lucas Arts to start beating us to death with inane amounts of coverage for their latest attempt to make a pile of steaming, hot money fall out of the now rotting, dead horse's ass that is Star Wars. I'm talking about Star Wars: Force Unleashed of course.

Currently there is a video preview of Force Unleashed up on Gametrailers.com that I recommend you don't watch unless you're keen on watching previews of games that scream failure. Believe me when I say that any hope you had of this game being good will be ripped apart like a hoodlum falling off of Jabba's barge and landing in the Rancor pit.

Like most previews, this one tells us a lot of things we already know like the fact that Force Unleashed is coming out on every current console system including the DS and the PS2. That's right. It's not a typo. I wrote the number "2." It is also revealed that the PS2 version will have content not available in the other versions of the game.

Let me get this straight: The version of the game that I will purchase for one of my brand new, $400-plus gaming systems will be missing content that is available only on a now obsolete system? Thank you Lucas Arts for helping me feel my investment in these outrageously over-priced systems was justified.

At least the DS has a different playing mechanic. That being said, I feel that in general putting games out on home consoles and portable systems is a no-no. There haven't been many games that I find myself so addicted to that I have to have a portable version to tide me over until I can get back to the "real" version.

So what other reasons are there for this video making you lose your only hope in this game? How about what Project Lead Haden Blackman has to say about the DS version of Force Unleashed:

"Anybody should just be able to pick up the DS and using the stylus, be able to chain together light saber attacks and combine those with force powers so that literally being unleashed is only a flick of the wrist away."

Great job, Blackman. You must have rehearsed that in the mirror for hours. Honestly, the developers in this preview hang on the word "unleashed" like it's a mantra. Maybe they hope that by saying it enough the gaming public will unleash their wallets and buy this schlock.